Can my girlfriend agree to sex if she is 15?
We get this type of question a lot – whether partners of different ages, or anyone under 18 can legally consent to sex. Knowing about the age of consent is an important part of having sex with a partner, especially if one or more of you is under the age of 18. Here’s what you need to know.
Age of consent
The age of consent refers to the age at which a person is legally able to agree to have sex with another person. This age is different from state to state, but it is generally between 16 and 18 years old.
With that being said, if you are 16 and of the legal age of consent in your state, but your partner is 15 - then it would not be legal to have sex with each other until your partner also reached the age 16.
If you do have sex with someone younger than the age of consent, there can be legal consequences, such as probation, fines, incarceration or listing on a sex offender registry.
Romeo and Juliet Laws
Consent can get a little bit more complicated in some states where they have a “close-in-age exemption,” sometimes called Romeo and Juliet exemptions. This means different things in different states, too. In some states, it means that if one partner is 18 and the other is of the age of consent and close to being 18, then they are considered exempt from the age of consent laws. In other states, it can mean that a person over the age of consent who has sex with a partner a few years under the age of consent can still be charged with a crime, but they may not have to register as a sex offender.
In short: consent laws are different from state to state. To learn more about the specifics of age of consent laws in your state, check out this website.
Other conditions of consent
While we’re talking about consent, we want to be sure to talk about more than just age - since that isn’t the only factor in consent. No matter what state you are in, a person cannot give consent if:
• They are incapacitated by drugs or alcohol
• They are unconscious or sleeping
• They have a developmental or physical disability that makes it more difficult for them to understand mature sexual behaviors and what they might be agreeing to
And any “consent” that was given because a person was threatened with any kind of physical or emotional harm to themselves or to others does not actually count as consent. Learn more in our FAQ about consent.
So, is it OK?
To answer the initial question: No, most likely your girlfriend cannot agree to have sex if she is 15. But it is incredibly mature of you to check in about something like that. And it’s understandable if this feels like a disappointing answer if you both feel ready to take that step. Your girlfriend is lucky to have a partner who wants to respect their boundaries and make the safest decision possible for both of you.
